QuakerQuaker

Primitive Christianity Revived, Again

Considering becoming a Quaker

I've been attending a meeting for about 4 years and I'm considering becoming a member. I think this would go through a clearness committee and I am definitely not clear on a few things. I'd like to start a conversation and ask for your responses.

I like the Quaker community a great deal. The meeting style is to my liking and the kids love it. I was raised Catholic and didn't like it because it was hard for me to believe all the stories and I did not like the hierarchy. Also a married a Protestant and he chose the church (more important to him than to me) which I am fine with. I have some challenges though, maybe 3. Let start with number 1.

Eldering of Vocal Ministry. I have observed members endearing the vocal ministry of others to the tune of "too intellectual" and "does that come from ego" or something like that. This seems nitpicking to me. Maybe some of us got something out of the message. Why make the messenger feel bad about his/her message? Can a quaker really judge, or should they judge messages like this? How in the world do they know or presume to know what is spirit inspired, and what is not? I'd like a perspective on why eldering like this occurs and is tolerated in meetings. Thanks.

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Permalink Reply by Forrest Curo on 5th mo. 28, 2016 at 12:37pm

Without knowing the flavor of your Meeting, this is a tricky question. The rule of thumb around here seems to be that anyone can speak in Meeting; and anyone can talk, favorably or otherwise, to the speaker after Meeting -- both to be taken with as much salt as seems appropriate.

There is a tacit informal pecking order; but basically this shouldn't matter unless one seriously offends enough people (or an influential enough person) for someone to call in a committee to deal with the situation.

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Permalink Reply by Howard Brod on 5th mo. 28, 2016 at 3:53pm

Nit-picking or critiquing messages offered during worship does not occur at my meeting. We care more about the Friends that grace us with their presence than such pettiness. In 30 years of worshipping at my meeting, perhaps this type of "eldering" has occurred once to my knowledge, and this is because the speaker was cruel towards another Friend in their message given during vocal ministry.

So while any depth of spiritual message is tolerated AND welcomed, cruelty and unkindness to another is not.

If your meeting has a habit of doing this nit-picking, you would be doing them a favor to let them know it is a big turn-off, and you have discovered this is not the norm in most Quaker meetings.

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Permalink Reply by William F Rushby on 5th mo. 28, 2016 at 7:13pm

This is a topic you could take up in your Bible study. A Bible study could legitimately include examination of Quaker materials. Discerning the appropriateness of ministry is an issue with a long history in the Society of Friends. I am sure that a lot has been written about it. The Tract Association of Friends most likely has tracts and other documents on this subject: http://www.tractassociation.org/tracts/ Some are even available online.

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Permalink Reply by Sherry Chemler on 5th mo. 28, 2016 at 11:17pm

Thanks for your suggestions William, I'll look into them.

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